“HAVEN’T SEEN MY DOCTOR”
Written by
Jim Mendrinos
I haven’t seen my doctor in years. No, I’m not saying that I need a check up or have a phobia. I’m just pointing out that I haven’t seen my personal physician in forever. I think he may be missing. Perhaps I should notify the authorities.
I have health care coverage. I joined a program, send in an obscene premium each month, and I picked my personal physician. Problem is whenever I make an appointment with him, he isn’t there.
It started out well enough. He saw me the first few times. We made jokes about my blood work results. He whistled a happy tune while giving me unspeakable exams. He even sent me a card letting me know I was overdue for a visit.
We bonded.
Not like my dentist. Oh, there’s an evil lurking in the land and it has a license in dentistry. See, I have a fear of dentists. An irrational fear. My wife has to hold my hand in the dentist’s office. Not because I’m a coward, but because I’ve hit more then one dentist. Well they always say to let them know if it hurts, right?
Back to the doctor. He and I got along beautifully. I thought we were buddies. Then it happened. The missed visits.
“Hi, your doctor has been called away. I’ll be filling in for him.”
Okay. How bad could it be. It’s just 1 time, right? Wrong. It’s been 11 times over the past 3 years. I always make an appointment with my doctor, I always get a different doctor.
Was it me? Did I do something wrong? Wasn’t I a good enough patient to keep him interested? I did all I could, flu, kidney stones, a refrigerator dropped on my big toe -- varied, interesting maladies, but still he avoids me. I feel so rejected.
I’m told that there used to be something called the family doctor. A person who you saw over and over again for all your medical needs. You developed a relationship with this doctor. They knew you and what ailed you. It was a rock of stability for you at the time when you needed it most, when you were sick. Not anymore.
Now you walk into sterile offices where paperwork junkies ask you for proof of insurance before they ask your name. You go into an exam room where someone who has never laid eyes on you asks you the same medical history questions that the last doctor that never laid eyes on you asked. If I could get one consistent doctor my visit could be 20 minutes shorter just from eliminating the quiz.
And above it all I have a nagging feeling that my doctor isn’t seeing me because he’s busy seeing some other doctor’s patients. It’s like musical chairs.
I did see my doctor, about a year ago, on the street. We stopped and chatted for a moment. I wondered if it was him at all. After all, it’s been so long, I could be mistaken.
But then, as we exchanged goodbyes and he walked away, I heard him whistle that familiar happy tune, and I knew it was him. Keep whistling doc, even if I never get to see you again.
